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Christmas has passed–how was yours?

I will admit–I was not at all I to Christmas this year. No decorations, no excitement, and up until the last week, no presents. My mind was too divided.

Even my annual photo calendar tradition, or especially this project, just kept getting put off. Then I finally decided to just wait. Wait for what? I’m not sure. Until my mind settles down I guess.

I’ve been very unsettled, between the approaching end for Dad, then good days here and there. Good-ish. Better than the bad days.

We all dreaded Christmas.

We knew Dad would not even know what was happening, let alone enjoy it. And Christmas should be enjoyed. How could we enter into celebration with Dad suffering in the next room? We just could not.

But we gathered anyway.


Went through the motions of gifts, and I went to Walmart and did all my shopping in one day. Unusual for me, the indecisive one. Practically ruled the day, and required less brainpower than creating something unique.

I say this, and it probably sounds like I’m depressed, and maybe I am in a way, but I feel like it’s more of the unsettled feeling more than the darkness of sadness. I think we all have a touch of sadness–it’s the grieving process–anticipatory grieving. Knowing it’s coming, yet living.

But I will say that we were surprised at Christmas. God gave us a gift. Dad woke up and talked more–he ate with relish, and asked to get up. He’s been too weak for any of that for weeks. Maybe it was Jimmy coming again. Maybe it was just a Christmas blessing.

So, even though it was a difficult process, we got him up with the Hoyer into the wheelchair. We brought him out into the living room and he even received a few gifts.

Dad didn’t know what to do. He didn’t understand the gifts. He did understand that he got pudding–“should I eat it now?”

He understood a hand to hold, and he held on tightly.

That was our best gift.

It didn’t last. Dad got tired and was still mixed up, but he seemed glad he’d joined in. We got him to bed and the day seemed better.

We played a few games, enjoyed family, knowing that nothing is promised beyond today.

God gave us a Christmas blessing.

How about you?

And what’s a celebration without a cat in a trash can?

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1. The 30-Day Faith Detox – Book Review from Create With Joy

2. Chicken Sheet Pan Nachos from Homemade on a Weeknight

3. Creating a Seed Starting Schedule from It’s My Sustainable Life

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11 Replies

  1. Bless your dear hearts. I sure understand how you feel. I pray God will please give you reprieves during this process and that you will feel Him ever close to your side.

  2. Merry Christmas to you and your family!!!!
    I know this was not a happy Christmas for you and your family but it does sound like you all did experience a Christmas miracle with your Dad…if only for a few fleeting moments…you will look back on that in years to come and smile at that wonderful memory!!!!
    Thanks again for hosting this charming party!! I truly appreciate the time and effort that goes into it! Stay safe, healthy and happy!!

  3. As challenging as this Christmas was I do hope that with time the blessing will be that you remember you responded with compassion and love to what can be a heart crushing experience. When at your breaking God sent you a reminder of why. Peace be with you and your family not just at the holidays but through out this journey and the hard days that will follow the conclusion.

  4. I’m sorry to hear your Christmas was so bitter sweet. I’m glad he felt well enough to join you all for that period of time. Every small memory is worth hanging onto!

    We also didn’t celebrate Christmas to much this year because it was our first year without my brother-in-law, we lost him to cancer in October. But he is in heaven with his maker and finally pain free.

    May 2023 bring you tons of blessings!


What is your experience? 💜 I read every comment, and so many times I find that I gain encouragement from what’s shared. ❤️