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Goodbye, Dad.

Lewy body dementia couple

For anyone who’s followed my blog for the last year or so, you have seen our journey and struggle as Dad progressed with Parkinson’s and Lewy Body Dementia. It’s been so hard to watch him suffer, lose weight, become confused, and just turn into the shell of the wonderful man that he was. In spite of everything Lewy stole, it could never take his sweet heart. Even in his last days, his loving personality dimmed, but never went away fully.

Two days ago he took his last breath. No fanfare, no emergency, he just kept sleeping until he did not awaken. His body wore out, and he was so tired. He had made his peace with God and man, and could not keep fighting. For that we are grateful.

I am sad, I am numb. I am glad he has no more agonizing pain. I’m also content that he doesn’t have to muddle through the torment of not knowing his closest loves, of wondering what’s happening to him, and desperately wanting to find someone who can make it stop. Lewy is done. It did enough.

But we lost a wonderful man. And we feel the loss of him.

Dad loved his kids, and adored his grandsons. He loved my mom so much, and he loved me. I count the care I gave him as the greatest blessing I could give to him, and the gift has given me precious memories of Dad’s last months of life.

Dad had dementia, but he never got mean. We thank God for that.

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Dad had LBD but he did not get violent. That’s another gift to us, because many do.

Dad thanked us for small services, he sometimes surprised us with humorous “commands”, but overall, he stayed kind.

I just closed down about twenty tabs on my phone about dementia, end of life care, medications and interventions. I will leave the Lewy body support group and stop reading of others with this terrible disease. I need that distance. I needed the info when I needed it. Now, I can’t keep my mind there.

As life goes, two hours after Dad died, I was in the store and ran into a friend. I asked after his wife, who I suspected of Alzheimer’s. No–it is Lewy Body for her too. I have other friends whose dads have this. More and more, it’s a household word.

If anyone you know has a loved one with this disease, the second most common form of dementia after Alzheimer’s, I would recommend the Lewy Body Dementia organization website for help. I would also join a Facebook support group, which was invaluable to me. Hearing others’ stories helps you to know you’re not alone. You can see where you may be headed, and mentally prepare a bit. You can vent and ask questions. The files are super helpful, and there are resources you can learn of.

Dad is gone. His memory is precious. I’ve been sorting photos for a slide show at his memorial. This has helped me to remember fun times I’d forgotten.

People ask me how I’m doing–how Mom’s doing. I can just say don’t ask. I don’t have an answer to that. It changes seven times in one day. Aimless, sad, nothing, tired, numb, and all over the place. We have to navigate new waters while life continues on.

God is with us. Good friends, family, and our faith have and will keep us moving along.

Enjoy the blog hop, and thank you for coming.

It’s cliché, but enjoy every moment with your loved ones. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. Time is short. Just make the most of it.

Laurie

Welcome to the Sunday Sunshine Blog Hop!

The Sunday Sunshine Blog Hop

This is a place to share some love and spread some sunshine!

The focus of this blog hop will be: anything related to making our homes more sunny and happy! If that’s through homemade cooking, a health tip that will help another, homesteading tips, homeschool successes or real-life struggles, or just whatever God is impressing you with in your home journey, please share it!

Guidelines for the Sunday Sunshine Blog Hop 🌤

  1. Click on the “Add your Link” Button below and add a great image of your project or recipe. Make sure you link to the page of your family friendly post – not the main page of your blog.
  2. Link up to three posts each week.
  3. Try to visit at least a few other blogs at the party. Be sure to leave a comment to let them know you stopped by.
  4. Link your post back to the Sunday Sunshine Blog Hop. If the hop isn’t linked to your post then you cannot be featured. All featured posts will be shared on my Pinterest/Social Media.
  5. Please link up posts that you haven’t linked to the hop before. You are welcome to link old posts from your blog.
  6. By joining the party, you are giving me permission to use one photo from your post with a link back to your site if it is selected as one of next week’s Features.
  7. This is a family-friendly link up! You are welcome to share home and family-oriented blog posts, focusing on homeschooling, homesteading and homemaking. Christian-friendly content, highlighting healthy life choices to encourage others!

Features for this week!

Thank you to everyone who came to participate. ♥️ Have a great week, and feel free to share the hop with others!

Laurie

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Ridge Haven Homestead Blog, Family, Homesteading Journey, Sunday Sunshine Blog Hop ☀️

40 Replies

  1. I am taking your advice; I’m making a point to spend as much time as I can with the ones I love. Thank you for the reminders.
    Prayers for you all are continuing!

  2. Laurie, I am so sorry for your loss. I will be praying for you, your mom, and your family. May God’s peace surround you even in the midst of the emotional ups and downs.

  3. I am praying for you and your family, just remember, you will see him again and he will not be sick but he will be forever healed.

  4. What a beautiful tribute to your dad and so many wonderful photos that are memory makers. I’m so sorry for your loss but now your dad is pain free and knows you as he watches down from heaven. Alzheimer’s and Dementia are both heartbreaking to watch a loved one go through. Sending hugs and prayers to your family.

  5. Laurie,
    So very sorry for your loss…
    Thanks so much for hosting this delightful party each and every week!! I really appreciate the time and effort that goes into it especially with all you were dealing with… Thank You!! Stay safe, healthy and happy!!
    Hugs,
    Deb

  6. What a beautiful remembrance page. I’ve loved seeing your dad in his high school photo, walking down the aisle with you, and your kids in their cub/boy scout uniforms with your dad. I’m so sorry for the LBD. It’s hard on everyone: the family and the person themselves.

    And how blessed you (and he) were that he didn’t become violent. My mom is in middle stages of Alzheimer’s. My poor dad who can barely walk takes care of her and they’re moving into their care home in early Feb. Even though it’s a nice “home” it’s so hard on him to leave his “real” home. I know you already know this, but your dad’s still with you each and every day.

    Take care of yourself in the coming year. Grief is a job and can really take it out of you. ♥♥♥

    Wendy TheInspiredEater.com

  7. Laurie, having watched my dad slowly die over a couple of years, I understand your loss. Take your time to process it and give yourself the freedom to mourn in whatever way your mind and body sees fit. I’m praying for you and your family.

  8. Laurie, I am so so sorry for this journey you’ve been on and for your loss. My late husband was in terrible pain and in process of being diagnosed with dementia, when he passed 18 months ago. I am grateful on his behalf that he no longer suffers. Blessings to you and all your loved ones in this strange time. Thanks for an amazing sharing today.

  9. I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad your father is at peace now and you have an angel in heaven now. Thank you for sharing. It was a heartfelt post. My thoughts are with you and yours. XO- MaryJo

What is your experience? 💜 I read every comment, and so many times I find that I gain encouragement from what’s shared. ❤️